2015 · 2015/10 · NaJoWriMo · NaJoWriMo 2015/10

NaJoWriMo 23/10/2015: Lost and Abandoned

Important things I have lost:

  • That patch of the wallpaper we kept for memory when we moved to a new flat. It had bunnies on it. Washed out, pale bunnies.
  • That skirt I wore for the first time, a passed down from my sister as I was never a girly girl, as I was never encouraged to wear frilly clothes, not to mention skirts, because I wasn’t a twig.
  • My father. The memory of his voice. The exact colour of his eyes.
  • The belief that I am good enough.
  • My virginity. I wasn’t particularly fond of or attached to it, and I am pretty sure I took care of it myself. But it’s something that girls should forever remember, and I do recall my first time with a man… It was awful.
  • My conciousness, a few times.
  • Memories of things I did while drunk.
  • Memories of being happy, truly, unconditionally.
  • My first dog.
  • My ability to let go.

Important things I have abandoned:

  • My country.
  • My family.
  • My creativity, at times.
  • Diet and exercise plans, by the dozen.
  • My second dog.
  • My inhibition, at the worst of times.
  • People who were harmful to me, finally.
  • Ideas when they became too real.
  • Opportunities half pursued.
  • Excuses when shit got real.

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